bon voyage!

my bike gang, the Pedalphiles, depart for europe on monday. here's a quickie rundown of the itinerary: we're riding from london to brighton, then brighton to portsmouth. from there we'll take a ferry to caen, france, and we'll spend a few days riding and taking the occasional train through normandy to paris. we'll have a few days in paris before we split up: chris & crystal back to london (and then crystal back to the u.s.); jesse to germany; and me to amsterdam and the hague to meet up with kathy, where we'll attend this thing.

i somehow wound up planning our route and schedule (somehow = no one else was doing it so i figured i should). the pedalphiles had a meeting last week where i presented the gang with three possible itineraries (everyone got their own handout), and then we took a vote. in case you guys didn't know, i am a total fucking nerd, and as evidence i present the introduction i wrote - the first page of the handout, which was distributed to the gang members.

The Pedalphiles Ride Europe!

Starring:

Christopher S. as “The Artiste.” Armed with a digital camera, and prone to trailing adorable woodland creatures off the beaten path, Chris’ wanderings lead the gang up several trees and down a couple of rabbit holes. Whether there’s a bunny or a beaver in Christopher’s viewfinder, you can bet heartwarming misadventures will abound!

Judy Gloom pulls double duty as the “Voice of Reason” and “A Raisin in the Sun.” Watch her freckles multiply on-screen as she settles disputes, and tells the gang how it really is! Don’t miss the dramatic final scene when she receives her doctor’s diagnosis of skin cancer. Thank goodness for French socialized medicine. A real tear-jerker!

With a cameo by Jesus AKA Jesse AKA Baby J as “El Machino.” Appearing only briefly as a brown blur who utters the single line, “See you in Paris!” watch Jesus leave his companions in the dust.

And our heroine, Crystal Deth, as the “Smoking Cyclist,” who pedals all over France in search of cannibis and Champagne in a Can. Crystal ultimately saves the day as the only Pedalphile who knows how to ask, “Where's the party at?” in French. Oooh-la-la!

With a special guest appearance by Elliott M. as “The Loner.” Content to ride solo, Elliott takes pity on the hapless Pedalphiles in England, and shows the gang a thing or two about riding on the wrong side of the road.

i'll be back on the 26th! ar of ar!