skating around the issue

i really hate wearing a mouthguard, and for years, i played derby without inserting one of those chewed-up, saliva-drenched, carcinogen-laden wads of plastic into my maw. yes, i was at the game where iron maiven's tooth was knocked out. the thing is, i've already lost three of my front teeth in two (separate) non-derby accidents, and i've never been totally happy with the dental work. my attitude is that if i wind up taking a bite out of the kickrail, it just means the time has finally come to upgrade my grill.

my former teammate, crystal deth, was my non-mouthguard-wearing comrade in arms (in her case, ostensibly due to gag reflex issues). i think we were the only people in the league skating games without them. however, in 2008, it became a penalty to play sans guard, and i couldn't risk punishing my team for my hard-headedness. begrudgingly, i had to suck it up.

fact: mouthguards do not make for flattering photos.


this monkey is out for blood!


both photos by charlie chu.

ok, ok. all of this mouthguard talk is a flimsy excuse to avoid dishing about the actual game, which we lost. so much for determination and triumph. fight crew doesn't skate on the banked track again until june, so we have a few months to get our heads together and regroup. in the meantime, i will be skating with three other teams: the flat-track Ri-Ettes, the banked track Ri-Ettes (i'm an alternate), and the L.A. Aftershockers (a one-off banked team put together to take on ACDG's Rocket Queens). no rest for the weary.

p.s. if you missed the bout and the amazing opening video, here's your chance to sing along at home: